Tuesday felt like a victory. Wednesday felt like an ass-whoopin'.
But my epiphany for the week is that I AM stronger than I think, and that my body is not impossible and resistant to change. I realized this as I was trying to learn how to change direction (going forwards to backwards). The first few times, I was shaky, I fell, I was frustrated... but the more I did it, the easier it got. By the end, I still wasn't perfect, but my muscles were learning the motions and I realized... I CAN do anything I want to... I just have to WANT to. It's not my body holding me back, but my mind.
Of course, Wednesday was a true test of my convictions. We did a lot of pace line skating and hot laps, and speed is NOT my forte. Not to mention that my back was killing me - when you do a lot of laps, you're constantly in a squat, and it takes a toll on your body if you're not conditioned to begin with. I had trouble keeping up, I couldn't go fast... whereas I felt great during Tuesday's practice, Wednesday had me feeling like a total yutz. I'm proud to say that I didn't drop out and stop much (just for a couple seconds to stretch), and even though I couldn't keep up with the others, I kept skating anyway, as best I could at my own pace. It was the best I could do, and I really, really tried.
So.... onwards and upwards. Aim says that core strength will go a long way towards helping with speed - from what I understand (of skating and of my own body), maintaining good form will make you a more efficient skater, and to maintain good form, all the necessary parts of your body need to be strong to stabilize and push. And it's not just your legs - your core is where everything originates. My core? Stretched out from baby-having. So I've got a lot of work to do in this department. And it's something I can do all the time.
It's funny - I've heard derby described as "a sport for non-jocks" (and it definitely isn't your typical jock-y sport), but in NO way does it mean that you can get away with not working hard. You're still an athlete, and you still have to act like one. It's been a long time since I was really an athlete (swim team in college, and not a good swimmer at that), but I did love it, so I'm trying to get back into that. At this point, I'm still not sure what my fate will be as far as passing the WFTDA tests, but I'll be damned if I don't get SOMETHING out of this process, whether I do end up becoming an SVRG member, or whether I just become a fitter person in general.