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Keep swimming or die

Apparently I'm like a shark: When I had derby, and Trojan Olympics, and whatever else I was doing, I could do it all. Now that I have nothing going on... I completely crash. I work, I go home, I hold my baby, I feed her, and then I conk out on the couch for a couple hours. Even on the weekends, when I could sleep and wake as early or late as I wanted to, I would hit the mid-afternoon drag and I just wouldn't be able to keep my eyes open.

What's happening to me? Is it a form of depression? Is it my body just trying to catch up after months of running around frantically? Is it my sudden lack of exercise (and resulting lack of endorphins)? All I know is, before I was doing LOTS, and now, I feel like I can't do anything. (Except buy lots of makeup, apparently.)

I've got to start running soon, in order to be in some sort of decent shape for marathon training. But how do I get my butt to the gym when I can't even stay awake by 4pm? You know, when I was doing derby, and I was really tired after work, I would NOT let myself nap before practice, because it makes me disoriented and dazed and completely destroyed my focus. I think I need to stop napping. And get moving.

You know, I was so proud of myself for going down a pant size (well, depending on the brand) last week, and it would really be a shame to go back up. I need to make some PLANS, honey. And get back to being badass.

This afternoon: grocery shopping, Giants opening game (early start, so early finish), and I think I will make myself go running after that. I've been feeling like deadweight lately, and I'm the only person who can change that, so... I need to change that.

And TOMORROW, I am definitely going skating at night. I need it. I've been having second thoughts lately about September bootcamp, just because... if I'm really going to commit to training for this marathon, I don't want to risk getting injured doing derby. But, I suppose, if that's going to be my logic, then there's no reason why I should wait until September to quit. So, I think I will wait and see what kind of progress I'm making in either venture. If I'm not much better at skating by September, and I'm totally on track with my marathon training, then I think I will know what path to choose.