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Ack. Weight Loss.

So, I tried to sign up for Weight Watchers again, but just for the eTools this time, and it wouldn't let me. The website kept doing something weird. My only option is to sign up for a monthly pass to meetings again, and I don't really want to do that, because it's $40 a month, and I KNOW I won't go to the meetings. (I know they work for a lot of people, but sometimes I just feel patronized. I'm not stupid when it comes to weight loss, I'm just really lazy!)

But I was cruising iPhone apps, and there are a bunch of cool ones that pretty much do the same thing as Weight Watchers - it recommends a daily calorie limit in order to lose weight at a specific rate (no more than 2 pounds per week, so it's controlled), and you just log everything you eat and all your workouts, and it keeps track for you. And there's a huge database of foods, so not only do they track calories, but they can tell you how much protein, carbs, sodium, etc, you're eating, just by you entering the food itself - you don't have to look all that crap up unless you're adding something totally new (but I just put in the calorie amount). I decided to try MyNetDiary.

Like WW, it doesn't tell you what you HAVE to eat - you could technically eat whatever you want as long as you stay within your daily limit, though obviously they make recommendations. So I'm very much in favor of that.

So, it's all free, and I just needed to buy a scale... ACK. Well, even though the news was bad, it wasn't HORRIBLE. I'm still down from where I originally started a way long time ago (pre-pregnancy, even), but not by much, so I have get motoring to stop this downward spiral. 


I'm trying to accept the fact that there is no such thing as "natural" and "instinctual" when it comes to being healthy, for me. I'm NEVER going to just "get it" and be able to eat right without even thinking about it. That's always been the reason why I quit dieting - I HATED thinking about food ALL the time - what to eat, when to eat, where I'm going and what is available to eat there, what I should bring to eat, etc. I hated it.


But you know what? I think that I HAVE to think about it. I cannot be mindless and unconscious. I think this will be the biggest part of the "lifestyle change" for me - forcing myself to actually think about what I eat and confront it. I am pretty sure that taking a good face-to-face look at my eating habits will show me that they are no bueno, and I think that I have been scared to do that. No one likes to admit to themselves that they are completely doing the wrong thing.


I've spent most of my life relying on food for comfort, pleasure, and society, and I think I do need to shift towards relying on food for NUTRITION and fueling my body. Especially if I want to achieve any of my athletic goals. At the same time, I have to find a way to make this work for me. I have to be real about it - am I ever totally going to give up fast food? No way. But do I have to get the fattiest, greasiest burger with bacon and a giant soda? Absolutely not. So this is where my changes need to start. I have to learn how to compromise with myself to work towards my goal.

This entry is dedicated to my best friend Becca, who IS achieving her goals and who looks awesome, and who inspires me every day!

Comments

  1. You can do it, too! I KNOW you can! Just takes determination. It's still a battle for me every single day.

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  2. Think of it this way: thinking is to some extent mutually exclusive with worrying. And even if you don't think about it, you're going to keep worrying. So why not address it consciously rather than always have that worry lurking somewhere in the background? Also: having a scale and weighing yourself daily is absolutely crucial. If nothing else, it gives you lots of potential small victories, keeps your setbacks small, since any loss is a victory, but you're not going to gain 10 pounds overnight.

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